Control the Controllables
At times we can all feel overwhelmed by life circumstances which can lead to a feeling of being stuck and struggling to make decisions. Many of us experience the noise of worry that we’re not doing enough, not being good enough, or anxiety which makes it difficult to get things done. It creates a loop of inaction and can cause us to underperform.
Research has found – that people who feel in control of their lives report better health, live longer, have fewer aches and pains, and faster recovery from illnesses than other people do. So, how can we gain control of our lives?
One of the five key elements of stress, is control, I contend that stress is created generally by Your Expectations on Demands which generally leads to a feeling of a lack of control.
Our ability to cut through all of what pulls at us, to find the emotional and physical balance, to think more clearly, and to advocate for ourselves is our ability to Control the Controllables and create better perspective on the rest.
Start taking control of your life, one piece at a time:
Clarify your core values and beliefs – this provides a proper perspective on our circumstances
Identify internal vs external forces – internal forces can be the strife we have with others who we feel are controlling us, external forces can generally be adjusted.
Review your thoughts/feelings, focus and environment – write them down daily and let these guide you to real change.
Take personal responsibility – but find an accountability partner.
Respond instead of reacting – examine the interpersonal relationships
Identify your emotions around lack of control and determine the underlying cause
Read, listen, and learn more – build a daily plan
An issue for many is an amplification of thinking errors and false beliefs. There are methods to adjust and manage your emotions, imaginations, and memories in the moment and dial them down. If your experienced emotions that are preventing you from experiencing the life you desire, we should talk.
Another area that can help is journaling - writing about your thoughts/feelings, focus and environment and the responses they trigger can help you uncover and change any disruptive patterns. It also helps you recognize when specific circumstances are contributing to control issues.
You can Control the Controllables but we need to learn to let go of the rest.